Zhanga: November 29, 2005

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Tuesday, November 29, 2005 (7 comments)

My mom wanted to see some photos, so I logged into Facebook and set her free. Whoops.

I did manage to keep her from seeing any really bad pictures (the worst she saw just had some beer), like the one of a really happy Charles on top of the East Cobb Park playground slide roof looking like he's about to eat a penis twice the size of a fire hydrant. Actually, I ordered a print of that picture a while ago (oops) and my mom checked the mail before I did (oops) so she saw it (oops) along with other bad photos (oops), but she hasn't said anything about it and she isn't going to. But if she had seen it on Facebook while I stood right next to her, then she'd be forced to say something about it, which would inevitably lead to her mentioning the other pictures I printed out, which would be really, really bad.

At least my mom was entertaining. She looked at the section where it says "Interested in," chuckled, and asked why I put "women" (sags, shut up). I wondered what was so funny, and I asked her if she would rather me put "men." Then I realized that she thought it was a fill-in-the-blank thing where I chose to type "women." Chinese parents don't seem to like this sort of thing. Off-topic, but while my mom was here over fall break, she asked me if holding hands in public was allowed at Duke. I guess she doesn't know about the graduation requirement of having sex in the library stacks.

I pointed out that there was a section below this that listed "Interests," where she noted that I had put stuff like eating, sleeping, watermelon, Coke, etc. She complained about this and asked why my interests are so stupid. Of course, I had no good answer because there is no good answer.

The next fun thing was when she noticed the thing that displays whether you're in a relationship. She asked me if Mary had a boyfriend, and I said no, but she went to look anyways. "In a Relationship with Jin Wang (Columbia)." I think my mom read this with the understanding that it wasn't serious. Obviously, she doesn't know Mary well enough.

Next, she noticed that somebody's (forgot whose) profile said "Looking for: Friendship." That's when I really began to regret letting my mom on this thing, because mine said "Whatever I can get." In the past, it also said "Random play," and apparently I had removed it, which is a really good thing. She would definitely have asked "what is 'Random play'?" and I would have had lots of fun trying to answer this while explaining that Facebook is just for fun and doesn't perfectly reflect reality.

Now I definitely can't let her on Facebook again... not after Pat's party and those pictures of Eva. I can't imagine how I'd ever explain to my mom how we managed to get 20 pictures of Eva spread like a broken compass, plus a drunk James on top. ("Oh... that's not Eva... I only posted those... because the girl looks like Eva and I thought it'd be funny... uhhh...")

5:19PM

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