Zhanga: May 11, 2004

The comments are at the bottom of the page. You can view old posts by clicking the months on the left sidebar. RSS feed.

« May 10, 2004 | All May 2004 posts | May 12, 2004 »

---

Tuesday, May 11, 2004 (3 comments)

Oops, if you read this earlier and couldn't tell who it was... I forgot to mention that this is none other than Ms. Bryan.

innocencewit0nus: asked about xangas
innocencewit0nus: and how to register to get some
innocencewit0nus: cause apparently
innocencewit0nus: she wants the class of next yr to get them so she can read up on their summer reading
innocencewit0nus: like, she wants to use it as a classroom tool or w.e

[Insert Ronjon comments here] Uhh, yeah that's bad... so everyone get ready to censor all your stuff.

11:56PM

Wow, Ms. Pepple just got nicer (is that possible?). She took off 4 (yes, four) points for not having... a CONCLUSION on my lab.

Who actually reads these?

[x] Fave country to go to?: China
[x] Are there people you won't reply to?: yes, bots (wait those aren't people)
[x] Favorite Pajamas: no
[x] Favorite City(s): no
[x] Favorite Plush: huh
[x] Favorite Magazine: pop sci
[x] Favorite sound: massive toilet flush
[x] Favorite Nickname: no (or Davie lol)
[x] Favorite shoes: I don't own like 900 pairs of shoes
[x] What time do you go to bed on weekdays: it was like 2, but hopefully now it'll become more like 12 (maybe even 11)
[x] Most romantic moment in your life: hmm... lol
[x] Most embarrassing moment of your life: well it was embarrassing enough that I shouldn't be telling
[x] You spend your time rather inside or outside: mix of both... right now I feel like going out
[x] Your Breakfast: BAO ZI!!
[x] What do you really dislike to eat: I hate eating shit, eating dust, and eating earthworms... but I hate mango too
[x] Laugh or dream: laugh in my dream
[x] Serious or funny: funny
[x] Fast or slow: fast
[x] You prefer being alone or having a relationship: i love to be alone because I'm antisocial and like to read quantum physics books in my spare time and then pretend to know complicated things and say calculus is easy when I'm actually only in geometry and then when Pepple tells me to respect God I'll just tell her "oh puhLEEEAAse!!" (I'm making fun of Haddad if you couldn't tell)
[x] Simple or Complicated: complicated keeps me from falling asleep
[x] Cremate or Buried when dead: I cease caring once I'm dead
[x] Sex or alcohol: sex (now I feel like Gene)
[x] Stay up late or go to bed early: stay up late
[x] Light or dark?: dark
[x] Speak or Silence: speaking like constantly = annoying, but silence is bad too
[x] tall or small girls/boys: small
[x] Newspaper: not really
[x] Hug or kiss: hug
[x] Happy or Sad: happy
[x] Life or Death: being with the Devil would be death, both literally and figuratively
[x] Gig or Disco:
[x] Sausages on top, or on the side: top
[x] What would you ask God if you could ask him 1 single question: I like Pat's answer - can you forget that i was wrong about you?
[x] When you die, what will be your last word: OWNED
[x] What is the thing you can't stand: Devil
[x] Are you an emotional person: sometimes I'm just too sleepy to react to things
[x] What was the promise you made to yourself at New Years Eve: be nice to people
[x] What is the most beautiful part on the female body: above the neck
[x] Most original place to ask your lover to marry you: I don't think about these things
[x] What super power do you wish to have: fly
[x] Want to be: eating
[x] Age you wish you were: 7
[x] Have a favorite quote: i think i had one but it's not favorite enough that i remember
[x] Do you live in the moment: i try not to
[x] Do you consider yourself tolerant of others: some people
[x] Do you have any secrets: yeah
[x] What is the compliment you get most from people: "wow you're so smart maybe you can do this for me: 2x+1=3"
[x] If a movie were made about your life, what would it be called: The Devil Strikes Back
[X] Can you sing? You mean kill ears with noise?
[x] Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool: not "just to look cool"
[x] Are you a loner: refer to "You prefer being alone or having a relationship" above
[x] Are you a daredevil: seldom
[x] Are you passive or aggressive: passive when i'm sleepy, aggressive after Devil has woken me up
[x] Have you got a question: i always have Questions... (Question Quigley!)
[x] What is your greatest strength and weakness: this is one of those gay GHP questions
[x] There are three wells, love, beauty and creativity, which one do you choose: creativity
[x] What is the fictional character you're most like: hahah Question Quigley but not really... dunno
[x] Do people know how you feel: Gene usually comes close
[x] Are you perceived wrongly: don't think so
[x] Pray: all the time
[x] Go to church: all the time
[x] Talk to strangers who IM you: i try to annoy the crap out of them
[x] Sleep with stuffed animals: my pillow
[x] Take walks in the rain: yes i love getting wet for no reason
[x] Talk to people even though you hate them: lol (yes)
[x] Drive: and hit things... almost got 4 birds today
[x] Like to drive fast: yes since my car can go really fast
[x] Been out of the country: no, i teleported here immediately after I was born
[x] Eaten something that made other people sick: WASABI! actually sick? well Coke has killed people before...
[x] Burped: no, I've never burped in my life
[x] Been unfaithful: ok I actually haven't done this (as opposed to burping)
[x] Ever had a surgery? hopefully never will
[x] Ever been picked on: elem and middle school
[x] Ever pulled an all-nighter?: a few times
[x] If yes, what is your record: 30 hours? dunno
[x] Ever gone one day without food?: you kidding? I haven't gone a day without MEAT!
[x] Ever talked on the phone all night?: lol no
[x] Ever slept all day?: not all day
[x] Thought you're going crazy?: yeah, seriously
[x] Ever been betrayed?: many times
[x] Had a dream that came true?: I hate you Pat ("yea. this reminds me of that gay song that david likes. never had a dream come true by sclub 7 i believe") anyways, yeah I have
[x] Have you ever killed an animal by accident?: probably... but hundreds of bugs on purpose.
[x] Been in a mosh-pit?: no
[x] Had a nervous breakdown?: no
[x] Believe in miracles?: no
[x] Believe in astrology?: no
[x] Believe in magic?: no
[x] Believe in luck?: depends how you define luck
[x] Believe in Yin and Yang: no
[x] Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever: oh I will
[x] Do you wish on stars?: no
[x] Do you remember your first love?: yes
[x] Still love him/her: hmm
[x] Do you consider love a mistake: often
[x] What do you find romantic?: dunno
[x] What are your turn-ons?: things
[x] What are your turn-offs?: whorey, skanky, etc. and stuff like being too aesthetic
[x] Do you base your judgment on looks alone: no
[x] If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest in dating you, how would you feel: depends if "no interest" is negative interest... if not, then I dunno
[x] Whats your favorite weather?: snow
[x] Are you stupid?: yes and it always hits a bottom after I make a stupid mistake and/or Dragos reminds me how stupid I am
[x] Do you taste good?: never tried... want a sample?
[x] Do you put out carrots for Rudolph?: idiot
[x] Are you the cookie or the milk?: so, do I get eaten or dipped into? dunno
[x] Are you an evil prep-whore?: I'm only occasionally evil
[x] Apple or Mango?: apple
[x] Did you die of basil poisoning?: I died of Busy Work poisoning
[x] Have you ever had a serious relationship?: for a yes/no answer, yes
[x] Have you ever made out with a guy?: every night
[x] Have you ever made out with a girl?: yes
[x] Have you ever been arrested?: no
[x] Are you rich?: no, not me... but we do live in east cobb
[x] Are you sure?: yes i do live here
[x] Are you obsessed with any colors?: no
[x] Pop Tart?: ownage
[x] Have you ever been in love?: maybe
[x] Are you the woman half of yourself, or the man half?: can't I be a whole??
[x] Are you going to have surgery for that?: ugh
[x] If you could go to any planet in the universe, which one would you go to and why?: traveling through large amounts of interplanetary radiation must suck (that means Earth)

Why did I fill that out? I promise that's the last one I'll do for at least a month because it's such a waste.

Ok so now the Eva story.

Apparently she pulled some prank to Akbar a while ago and he's looking to get even. His cousins tell her Sunday night that he's in the hospital because of a drunk driver, and so she gets concerned (well, who else would she buf every night?). So she asks for visiting hours, where the hospital is, etc. Of course I'm the one who offers to take her there... haha but there's a complication.

Akbar has first period with her and he won't skip. So I take Eva to school on Monday morning. This is even better than planned, because I told her I'd go to look at the burned trailer, and she asked me to pick her up. Setting yourself up is always good. So Akbar wears a shirt that says Eva Wei you got Punk'd or something like that... I didn't really get a good view of it because I was laughing too hard. He walks into Harrison's room, where Eva has already settled. She looks surprised to see him, and I was waiting for the violence to begin.

I had armed myself with a pair of cameras, a digital and a conventional disposable. I used the digital because I wanted to be able to retrieve the image quickly... but unfortunately, I had forgotten about its 4-5 second delay between pushing the button and the picture being taken. So I didn't get a very good image. I should have used the spring-loaded, instant-action disposable because then I could have wound the thing and shot two or three pictures in the same time it took that gay old digital to get that one.

Further contributing to image quality loss was the teacher. She doesn't really like violence, so once it started (and just after I pushed the button on my camera), she got really angry and yelled "WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!?!" That scared me and I quickly left the building.

I heard that the number of kicks from Eva to Akbar that day exceeded 30, and the number of slaps was only marginally less. Akbar told me that she bit him three times on the neck, and he pointed to an area below his belt where Eva bit him. He was pretty much pointing at his balls.

I also heard that later in the day she gave him nine long hugs and then they stayed around at school till 5:30. If only life was as easy for me as it apparently is for Akbar.

Oddly enough, when I called that afternoon to ask if I'm still picking her up to go to the hospital to see Akbar (lol), she was with Akbar in the school auditorium at the time. All she said to me was a really loud, shrill "FUCK YOU, I FUCKING HATE ---, FUCKER!" The --- is untypable because it was an odd combination of "HIM" and "YOU," and this was confirmed by Akbar.

Yeah, sure she hates "HIM." That's why she "bit" his balls.

;-)

6:52PM

Show Comments »

« Hide Comments

---

Older posts can be viewed through the links to the left, under the main menu.
76 hits since May 1, 2008.

Contents

Home Zhanga Funny Stuff More Funnies Random Pages External Links Search Contact