Snoddy Knows

Miss Snoddy is great. She's only the second teacher to earn an entire page on my site.

Newest on top.

  1. Tyson counting in Latin: "Uno, duo, trio, quattor, quinque, SEXXX!!"
    Snoddy: "You know, shouting that is a great way to guarantee that you won't get any."

  2. Snoddy: "Don't have your own children. Have someone else's."

  3. Snoddy: "Yes, I often refer to you as 'my slaves.'"

  4. About monopolies and unfair practices:
    Snoddy: "Imagine that at this school no one was doing anything about cheating, everyone was cheating and no one cared about it... Ms. Smyser is DEAD!!"

  5. Tim: "Would I get really cool SEG points?" (for taking birth control pills)
    Snoddy: "You'd get really cool breasts!"

  6. KT: "Do you ever think of us as your children?"
    Snoddy, nodding sadly: "Then I shudder and make an appointment to be sterilized."

  7. Brett: "Who would you vote for [president], me or Tim?"
    Snoddy: "I would move to Canada."
    Tim tries to ask some more.
    Snoddy: "Canada's looking real good."

  8. Snoddy: "I left my dog in today. I heard there would be freezing rain today and I didn't want to go home and have to chip him out."

  9. Snodd-dawg asked where the Americans wanted to expand to, and Gene says Asia.
    Snodd-dawg: "No actually, they didn't like Asian people."
    Gene: "Is that why you don't like me, Miss Snoddy, because I'm Chinese?"
    Snodd-dawg: [pause] "Well, that's not the reason. See, I like CiCi a lot... and Kelvin's really nice." [another pause] "It's just you, Gene."

  10. James changes a letter so the board reads "Presidential erection." He then asks if she noticed.
    Snoddy: "Yeah I saw it, but we're not studying Bill Clinton yet."

  11. Ronjon: "Miss Snoddy, don't you love Mr. Edelstein?"
    Snoddy: "Not in the way you probably do."

  12. Snoddy: "This was kind of the coming out for the United States... in the debutant way, not in a homosexual way."

  13. Snoddy: "What's the opposite of provincial?"
    Random: [mutter]
    Snoddy: "The opposite of provincial is antiprudential?"

  14. Snoddy: "Ok. Retarded people. Let's return to the topic at hand."

  15. Chris Wyland: "Miss Snoddy, I can't see what's written on the board behind you."
    Snoddy: "I don't care."

  16. Kent: "Literature?! No one likes literature!"
    Snoddy: "Everyone likes literature, Kent... everyone who's smart."

  17. Snoddy: "Roger, if I have to take that knife and shove it up your nose, neither one of us will be very happy."
    Gene to Snoddy: "You will be very happy."
    Snoddy: "Only very briefly, until the spray of blood becomes uncontrollable."

  18. Drew called Miss Snoddy "Ms. Bryan" during class. I heard that Snoddy flipped out. Then:
    Pat: "He called you Ms. Bryan again, during lunch."
    Snoddy: "He's going to be getting a faiiiiling grade. F!"

  19. Snoddy to Wilcox: "Here's a tip for life, Jonathan: Don't ever eat anything James gives you."

  20. Snoddy shaking head: "Is everyone high?"

  21. Snoddy: "It's time for sex... I know I'm only going to be able to keep your attention if we do sex now."

  22. Snoddy: "I generally don't offer sex therapy of any kind."

  23. Snoddy: "Sometimes I go home and wonder, 'is this the day I'll start drinking heavily?'"

  24. Snoddy: "...they moved their familages..."
    She meant families and villages.

  25. Snoddy: "I'm not having any babies. They're wet and... gross. They are, like, full of snot and stuff."
    [eww face]
    Snoddy: "They eat one hundred dollar bills!"

  26. Someone brings in a glass Coca-Cola (YUUUUMMMMMMMM!!!!!!) bottle having something to do with the Louisiana Purchase to get SEG points.
    Chris Wyland: "How come I can't bring in something like that for show and tell?"
    Snoddy: "Because I hate you."
Last updated September 4, 2004.
693 hits since March 29, 2006.